The evening class commenced with one student: a Chinese visiting scholar at Columbia who loves trading stocks and watching the World Cup. He is middle-aged, has a wife and a grown up son. His "English name" is Ben.
Thou art that.
"I see myself in the other."
There are more students, and sometimes they are there at the start, and sometimes they arrive later. We had about ten minutes alone to begin the class, which is how the first class began. During the first three weeks we didn't know if the class would have enough students to continue. Constant uncertainty. That's been my life the past eight years. Especially the past five. Although it's actually everyone's entire lives.
The day had started with lessons about business titans. I am not a business man, so it was strange to teach about these people. Even so, there is much to learn about living and giving from Carnegie, Rockefeller and Gates.
Then we talked about gender equality. The first class has several male students, but it just so happened that this morning's class consisted of fourteen women and one student's younger son who was observing for the day. Lucky him.
About eleven hours later I found myself conversing about the intricacies of soccer, a sport about which I know next to nothing, because Ben was enthusiastic about it, and my job is to feed off of his enthusiasm and transform that energy into making him even more enthusiastic about speaking.
While he was talking about soccer I remembered that I don't care about soccer. There are a lot of things I care about, but soccer is not one of them. Many people care about soccer, but I am not one of them. The World Cup may be the most popular sporting event in the world, but this is one area where I show my American colors with my absence of enthusiasm. When I was younger I used to care a lot about basketball, American football, and baseball, and talk forever about it to people who did not care, namely my mother and my sister. Speaking of which, my sister was obsessed with The Beatles to such a degree that even though I knew in my soul that they were amazing, I grew to loathe them. As soon as she went to college, I loved them. Maybe someday I'll love soccer, but I doubt it. I love my feet, but I prefer to wield a ball with my hands.
Anyway, the conversation was pleasant, and I enjoy talking to Ben quite a bit. He's a very positive, inquisitive and easily intrigued human being. Even so, I thought it amusing that I begin my evenings with a man from the culturally, linguistically and geographically opposite land from my nation. On top of that, I am a writer living on a relatively small income, while he admittedly loves stock trading. When he talks about stocks he might as well be speaking Mandarin to me. I'm sure he'd feel the same way if I went on about magical mystery Still, there is a unifying ground beneath him and me.
Soon we were joined by a Chinese woman, a Spanish man, a Dominican man and a Dominican woman. A few of them know each other from previous classes, so they get along well, but there is still a marked difference between the abilities of the Chinese scholar and the Dominican taxi driver, both of which I often find myself walking alongside on the ride to the subway once class is finished. Balancing is a challenge. You don't want the eager student to be held back from his full potential, but the less educated student is just as deserving of guidance and attention. After all, he's paying the school the same amount for my time. They're both buying communication skills.
Today the chapter in the text book was about buying things. "The material world." We asked each other what we liked to buy. The Chinese man loved to window shop and talk to salesmen about new products so that he can know which stocks to trade. The Spanish man shrugged his shoulders. The Dominican woman smiled, got a little embarrassed, and said she loved to buy shoes. I smiled and asked her why. She laughed and said she didn't know, but she sees them and has to have them. She really only wears them on weekends since she has to wear a work uniform on work days. But she has a different pair for just about every weekend of the year.
We also learned vocabulary, including the word "generalize." I have met many women who love shoes. I've also met many women who don't appear to care at all about shoes, but it's something I associate with women more often than men, just as men tend to care about sports a little more than women, even though I can think of plenty of women who love sports more than certain men I know. I understand sports and used to love them more than any reasonable human every should, but I don't care about them so much anymore. However, I have never understood shoe worship. Ever since that first year in the city when I saw a Sex and the City sweepstakes commercial with the women slowly walking toward the camera, wind blowing in their hair and the announcer glorifying winning many pairs of shoes as if they were the ultimate prize of being alive, I became very confused, because I'd never thought about them before. Naturally they should be comfortable and help you make it from place to place, but after that, what's left? I suppose I encourage everyone to look deeper at their world, so I can't fault those who find beauty in a shoe.
The Spanish student works in design marketing and said they did a study where they learned that Americans, on average, buy over 60 pairs of shoes a year. That's more than one per week. I have five pairs of shoes. So did he. The woman said she had about 30 in America, but more in her home country. I've heard those figures before, from other students in San Francisco. 10 or more was typical for a guy, but 20-30 was normal for a woman, and one even had 100. The man said Americans buy so many because shoes are very inexpensive here. Huh.
The thing is, shoes are important. I walk all the time (although not always with shoes), and I've experienced and learned much thanks to their help in making me move. I'm happy there are quality artisans who can design footwear that enables me to climb mountains, play basketball and walk through cities with greater comfort and ease, allowing me to reach higher quality. Beyond that though, I don't understand my society's fascination with them. I see just about everything else on a person before I look at what they put on their feet. That being said, if you love shoes as much as my student, please, by all means, continue to love shoes. The world loves being loved in all its forms. Just about everyone I know loves parts of the world that I don't understand, just as I love much that others can't comprehend.
They asked me what I buy. I tend to spend my money on experiences, not materials. If they are material, I usually need them to live, or at least taste deliciousness. When I was younger I bought a lot of music, but that's about it.
When I walked home I got to thinking about what I've gained from all of this learning, seeking, pondering, wandering, wondering, losing, winning, fighting, creating, writing, sharing, caring, loving and playing in my 20's. Obviously, I have gained much, although, at this point, the material gains are hard to measure. That's one reason I write about these experiences and ideas.
I think one of the most important lessons I've learned is about living with differences, and accepting the joys of my partners in living which I can't share. I have learned to care about what's here and there.
Thou art that.
"I see myself in the other."
There are more students, and sometimes they are there at the start, and sometimes they arrive later. We had about ten minutes alone to begin the class, which is how the first class began. During the first three weeks we didn't know if the class would have enough students to continue. Constant uncertainty. That's been my life the past eight years. Especially the past five. Although it's actually everyone's entire lives.
The day had started with lessons about business titans. I am not a business man, so it was strange to teach about these people. Even so, there is much to learn about living and giving from Carnegie, Rockefeller and Gates.
Then we talked about gender equality. The first class has several male students, but it just so happened that this morning's class consisted of fourteen women and one student's younger son who was observing for the day. Lucky him.
About eleven hours later I found myself conversing about the intricacies of soccer, a sport about which I know next to nothing, because Ben was enthusiastic about it, and my job is to feed off of his enthusiasm and transform that energy into making him even more enthusiastic about speaking.
While he was talking about soccer I remembered that I don't care about soccer. There are a lot of things I care about, but soccer is not one of them. Many people care about soccer, but I am not one of them. The World Cup may be the most popular sporting event in the world, but this is one area where I show my American colors with my absence of enthusiasm. When I was younger I used to care a lot about basketball, American football, and baseball, and talk forever about it to people who did not care, namely my mother and my sister. Speaking of which, my sister was obsessed with The Beatles to such a degree that even though I knew in my soul that they were amazing, I grew to loathe them. As soon as she went to college, I loved them. Maybe someday I'll love soccer, but I doubt it. I love my feet, but I prefer to wield a ball with my hands.
Anyway, the conversation was pleasant, and I enjoy talking to Ben quite a bit. He's a very positive, inquisitive and easily intrigued human being. Even so, I thought it amusing that I begin my evenings with a man from the culturally, linguistically and geographically opposite land from my nation. On top of that, I am a writer living on a relatively small income, while he admittedly loves stock trading. When he talks about stocks he might as well be speaking Mandarin to me. I'm sure he'd feel the same way if I went on about magical mystery Still, there is a unifying ground beneath him and me.
Soon we were joined by a Chinese woman, a Spanish man, a Dominican man and a Dominican woman. A few of them know each other from previous classes, so they get along well, but there is still a marked difference between the abilities of the Chinese scholar and the Dominican taxi driver, both of which I often find myself walking alongside on the ride to the subway once class is finished. Balancing is a challenge. You don't want the eager student to be held back from his full potential, but the less educated student is just as deserving of guidance and attention. After all, he's paying the school the same amount for my time. They're both buying communication skills.
Today the chapter in the text book was about buying things. "The material world." We asked each other what we liked to buy. The Chinese man loved to window shop and talk to salesmen about new products so that he can know which stocks to trade. The Spanish man shrugged his shoulders. The Dominican woman smiled, got a little embarrassed, and said she loved to buy shoes. I smiled and asked her why. She laughed and said she didn't know, but she sees them and has to have them. She really only wears them on weekends since she has to wear a work uniform on work days. But she has a different pair for just about every weekend of the year.
We also learned vocabulary, including the word "generalize." I have met many women who love shoes. I've also met many women who don't appear to care at all about shoes, but it's something I associate with women more often than men, just as men tend to care about sports a little more than women, even though I can think of plenty of women who love sports more than certain men I know. I understand sports and used to love them more than any reasonable human every should, but I don't care about them so much anymore. However, I have never understood shoe worship. Ever since that first year in the city when I saw a Sex and the City sweepstakes commercial with the women slowly walking toward the camera, wind blowing in their hair and the announcer glorifying winning many pairs of shoes as if they were the ultimate prize of being alive, I became very confused, because I'd never thought about them before. Naturally they should be comfortable and help you make it from place to place, but after that, what's left? I suppose I encourage everyone to look deeper at their world, so I can't fault those who find beauty in a shoe.
The Spanish student works in design marketing and said they did a study where they learned that Americans, on average, buy over 60 pairs of shoes a year. That's more than one per week. I have five pairs of shoes. So did he. The woman said she had about 30 in America, but more in her home country. I've heard those figures before, from other students in San Francisco. 10 or more was typical for a guy, but 20-30 was normal for a woman, and one even had 100. The man said Americans buy so many because shoes are very inexpensive here. Huh.
The thing is, shoes are important. I walk all the time (although not always with shoes), and I've experienced and learned much thanks to their help in making me move. I'm happy there are quality artisans who can design footwear that enables me to climb mountains, play basketball and walk through cities with greater comfort and ease, allowing me to reach higher quality. Beyond that though, I don't understand my society's fascination with them. I see just about everything else on a person before I look at what they put on their feet. That being said, if you love shoes as much as my student, please, by all means, continue to love shoes. The world loves being loved in all its forms. Just about everyone I know loves parts of the world that I don't understand, just as I love much that others can't comprehend.
They asked me what I buy. I tend to spend my money on experiences, not materials. If they are material, I usually need them to live, or at least taste deliciousness. When I was younger I bought a lot of music, but that's about it.
When I walked home I got to thinking about what I've gained from all of this learning, seeking, pondering, wandering, wondering, losing, winning, fighting, creating, writing, sharing, caring, loving and playing in my 20's. Obviously, I have gained much, although, at this point, the material gains are hard to measure. That's one reason I write about these experiences and ideas.
I think one of the most important lessons I've learned is about living with differences, and accepting the joys of my partners in living which I can't share. I have learned to care about what's here and there.
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